Dalton Family Christmas Card, December 2004

Photo Christmas Card, Family

Another year, another year closer to college

Merry Christmas to our Friends and Family!

It’s been another whirlwind year for the Dalton family[1]. Maia has started kindergarten and we are very proud of all her achievements! She is still working on math and not pooping in the bathtub, both of which are very important, but only one of which will help her get into college![2]

Zachary made his Squirt hockey team and is lighting up the ice! The coach said he’s the fastest skater on the team. We’re hoping the pro and college scouts will take notice sooner rather than later! Because he has had a terrible year in school so far and we don’t want him living at home when he’s 18![3]

Thomas and I are very excited about all of the changes in our lives, which nobody ever asks about because they only care about our children! We are so excited about going to Disney World in February[4], and then going some place actually fun years from now when we can leave our children behind!

Here’s to another year of scrubbing crayons off the walls, making 3 dinners every night because our two children don’t eat normal food, and spending every free moment driving to another rink or piano lesson or playdate, silently wishing away the next 10 years until Maia and Zach can take care of themselves!

Holiday Wishes,

Tom, Susan, Zach, and Maia


[1] The Saginaw Daltons. Not to be confused with the Dalton Gang.

[2] Susan is incorrect here. Many colleges do expect both.

[3] We are happy to report that Zach will be off to Michigan next year. We obtained a copy of his acceptance letter, in which President Mary Sue Coleman calls his essay on growing up with terrible parents “heartbreaking.”

[4] Observers called this vacation “harrowing.” Disney staff eventually had to forcibly separate the family “in order to prevent de-happification of the other consumption units.”


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